


Paths We Follow

by eternallydaydreaming



Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (TV 2012)
Genre: Betrayal, Discussion of Abortion, F/M, Infidelity, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-06
Updated: 2017-01-29
Packaged: 2018-08-13 07:58:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 21,726
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7968670
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eternallydaydreaming/pseuds/eternallydaydreaming
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For every fork in the road, we make a choice and must deal with the consequences that follow. For April, this will either be her path to eternal happiness or ultimate sorrow. Rated M for thematic elements. 2012-verse</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Prologue

_What have I done?!_

She held her breath and dared not move. In that moment, all she wanted to do was fade away into the surrounding darkness of her bedroom. If only she could sink through the bed and crawl out of the apartment then she could make herself disappear. But she had zero chance of escaping this situation.

April bit her lip and retraced the events of that brought her here. It was supposed to be a quiet night – just her and Casey. She was thrilled to finally have him to herself for only the second time since they have been home. Winter break may have been a month long but the time could slip so quickly. Casey spent time with his family and they both hung out with the turtles but tonight was reserved just for them. April was finishing prepping dinner at his apartment (which Mr. Jones graciously loaned them) when her happiness shattered into a million pieces. All it took was one text – one girl – one picture. April was never supposed to find out. It happened in a brief minute Casey had left his phone unattended and within her view – a small slip on his part. He tried to explain it – rationalize it – assure her it was a one-time mistake and that she wasn’t over him, even stalking him. Her head spun with hurt, betrayal, sorrow; her mind tried to juggle her thoughts with his pleas. Finally she felt like she was suffocating and fled the apartment. 

With tears streaming down her face, she barged into her dad’s condo and locked herself in her old bedroom. Dr. O’Neil had knocked on her door and begged her to talk to him but was only answered with hysterical sobs. She had lain on her bed for what felt like hours. The tears finally ran out leaving her eyes burning and blood shot. Her body was cold and numb. Her ears became deaf to all background noise; she couldn’t hear the honking from the taxis or the people walking by, or the television from the living room. Her dad had given up on coaxing her out and hoped the TV would eventually draw her from her room. In her current state, she barely even registered the soft tapping at her window. By the third round of taps, she forced herself off her bed and swung the curtains open revealing the tall, bo wielding mutant ninja. Did she call him? She didn’t remember. Maybe she ghost dialed him and he heard her sobs. It didn’t matter; he was here now – for her. As soon as he set foot on her floor, April flung herself into Donnie’s arms and sobbed into his plastron. He didn’t ask any questions. Instead he stroked her hair in hopes to comfort her. When she finally regained control, April looked deep into Donnie’s eyes. Those brick colored eyes must have had a magnetic pull because before she knew it her lips had pressed against his. She parted her lips and gently pulled on his bottom lip. When she drew back and opened her eyes, she was met with a confused – well, more like dumbfounded and befuddled – expression.

“A-April?”

“Shh!” She pressed her fingers against his mouth. “For once, don’t think….”

And that’s exactly what she did – not think. Now here she was lying on her bed with Donnie’s strong arm pulling her into his plastron. His face was buried in her red locks, and his steady breath tickled the back of her neck, sending goosebumps down her back. She couldn’t stay here like this but if she moved he would surely wake up. Damned if she did and damned if she didn’t. Even if she freed herself, there was still a big problem – he was in her bed! April suppressed the groan that threatened to escape. Maybe she could slip away and crash at a friend’s house for the night. She just needed time to sort things out before facing him again. Finally, April steeled her nerves and ever so slowly tried to wiggle out of his grasp and off the bed.

“U-ugh…? April?”

She momentarily froze in place and her heart seemed to skip a beat.

_Crap!_

April slowly sat up and wrapped some of the bed sheet around her body, holding it firmly against her breasts. The bed shifted balance as Donnie sat up and reached out to her, lightly grasping her shoulder. Her shrug was harsher than she intended but managed to free herself from his touch. 

“April?” The confusion in his voice now had turned to concern – distress – worry.

“Look, Donnie,” she jumped in before he could say anything else. She kept her back to him lest her courage escape her if she made eye contact. “I…this…I wasn’t in the right state of mind. I was emotional – hurt - and wasn’t thinking straight. I shouldn’t have dragged you into this.”

“April….”

“Donnie, don’t make this any harder than it has to be. As far as we both should be concerned _this_ never happened…It would be best if you…you should leave.”

Silence. No one moved for the longest time. Perhaps he needed time to process what happened or to decide his next move. Finally, the bed shifted, causing April to sink in as Donnie’s side to puff back up. The window opened and soon she was left alone with her thoughts and the cold embrace of winter’s icy tendrils.


	2. Winter's Path

Chapter 1 – Winter’s Path

The ceiling was just as white as the snow falling outside. Too bad the snow turned into disgusting dirty brown slush on the New York City streets. Lately it seemed that no matter how much beauty surrounded her April’s thoughts seemed to always take the most pessimistic turn. The new year along with the new semester was supposed to give her a fresh start – a chance to start over - yet she was plagued with the dismal events of winter break. April officially ended her relationship with Casey. Despite attempts to “work it out” April knew she could never trust him again – always wondering if he was with her or anyone else for that matter. She couldn’t afford to keep wondering if he was truly being faithful or just feeding her what she wanted to hear. With three and half years left of college, she really needed to focus on her studies and land a journalism job. Love and heartbreak can wait. 

Then there was Donatello. She opted to avoid the turtle and his brothers ever since that night. She only saw Raphael once since then when he checked in on her after finding out about the break up from Casey. She explained how he cheated on her and told him she just needed to refocus and be ready for the winter/spring semester. He was very understanding, which also meant that Donnie too was concealing the truth of that night. It was for the best – surely he knew that too.

April spent the first couple of weeks thoroughly distracted with her coursework and papers – never giving a second thought to the worst winter break ever. Then she got hit with this wretched stomach bug that was refusing to go away. Some days were better than others but at times she couldn’t stay through a full lecture without desperately running out to find a toilet to throw up in or wanted to curl up in the fetal position. Honestly, life had decided to test her resolve. And now here she was, lying patiently on the little examining table – well as patiently as one could in a cold room, staring at a ceiling. University clinics were no different than any other clinic.

_At least I didn’t have to dress down. Wish the doctor would just hurry up and give me the prescription already._

As if on cue, a gentle tap roused April from her thoughts. The doctor’s head soon popped through and greeted her warmly.

“April, I have a few more questions to ask you. You said that your stomach has been upset on and off for about a week or so now. Have you noticed anything else being different lately?”

_Anything else?_

April furrowed her brow and thought. “Not really.”

“Have your breasts been tender?”

April quirked her eyebrow at the odd question but figured the doctor had her reasons for asking.

“Well yeah. I’m betting my period will be starting soon.”

“When was your last regular period?”

April bit her lip. “My cycle has never really been regular. I sometimes skip a month. I heard that’s pretty normal in athletic girls.”

“Indeed, that can be the case. When was the last time you had intercourse?”

Now the conversation got personal, causing April blushed furiously at the question.

“April, everything we talk about here is purely confidential. It will help me in determining when you may have conceived the baby.”

“Wha..a…a..?!”

April’s eyes widened in confusion. Did she hear that correctly?

“What do you mean by ‘conceived’?”

Mustering the patience that was most likely included in her professional training, the doctor replied, “I ran your urine sample through a pregnancy test. It’s positive. You’re pregnant, April.”

The world stopped and went silent. Her brain wanted to reject the notion all the while processing the validity behind the doctor’s news. 

“But…but I was on the pill…”

“How long have you been on the pill?”

“Since I was seventeen.” 

“Did you ever take a break from the pill or was prescribed any medications close to the time you had intercourse?”

April bit her lip as she recalled the events of winter break.

“I was put on some antibiotics for an ear infection close to Christmas. I had sex around that timeframe.”

The doctor scribbled notes into April’s file causing the girl to be instantly self-conscience of being judged for her actions.

“April, did the physician who prescribed the antibiotics warn you about the side effects of taking antibiotics while on contraceptives?”

The red head only shrugged. Honestly she couldn’t remember what the doctor may have said. She went to a walk-in clinic and couldn’t remember if she disclosed that level of personal information to a random physician. Why would that have been relevant? Judging by the frustrated sigh, April was about to find out.

“April, some antibiotics alter the effectiveness of oral contraceptives. It is recommended that alternate contraception be used while taking antibiotics otherwise the egg is vulnerable to fertilization.”

The realization hit her hard – almost like a slap to the face. Dizziness suddenly took hold, spinning the room around her. This couldn’t be real. This couldn’t be happening to her! April then had the sudden urge to vomit – then again that would have just been her hormones. She soon became deaf to the world as her mind raced with questions of how could she possibly raise a child and finish school at the same time. Would she need to drop out? Maybe part-time schooling could work…but she would lose her scholarship. What about the costs of caring for a child? She would need to a get a job. Her dad would probably help but she just didn’t feel right being completely dependent on him. Then again without him, she would be alone in this endeavor.

The distress must have been evident through her expressions for the doctor reached out and gently squeezed April’s hand while simultaneously slipping her a piece of paper. April unfolded it and found the prescription for the prenatal vitamins. She just stared at the words, too shocked to move.

“Those will help with the baby’s development.” The doctor hesitated before continuing, “Would the father be involved?”

“Huh?” April finally made eye contact with the Doctor.

“The baby’s father – is he the type who would be involved in raising him or her?”

April bit her lip and thought a moment. Tears began to well up but managed to contain them.

“I…I don’t know. W-we ar-aren’t together anymore…”

Tears finally overcame the floodgates and streamed down her cheek. She truly would be alone in this ordeal. She dropped her head into her hands to hide her turmoil though her sobs spoke volumes. The doctor turned and opened a file cabinet, shuffling through various papers and pamphlets.

“Here,” she handed April the small stack. “There’s information in here ranging from maintaining a healthy diet during pregnancy to support groups for young single mothers, and I’ve included a list of highly rated obstetricians. I understand that this is all overwhelming and there are a lot to consider. Do you have a family support system you can turn to? Your parents perhaps?”

April only nodded silently.

“That’s good. That may be helpful during this time. And, I know it’s not my business, but maybe you should consider talking to the father. If he does want to be involved, at least you will be able to support each other.” The doctor rose to her feet and offered her hand out. “If you have any questions, do not hesitate to call me.”

April offered her limp hand and gave the doctor’s hand a weak shake. Then she was left alone in the room to change. As if on autopilot, April aimlessly dressed and left the office, stepping into the cold, crisp winter air. Winter’s embrace suddenly felt colder than the night Donnie had left her room – the night when she learned of Casey’s betrayal – the night that forever changed her life. She turned her gaze up in time to see a fresh round of snow begin their dance from the sky. As a kid the scene would have enchanted her as if she was walking through a winter wonderland, but now the snowfall against the grey sky just seemed ominous and just plain lonely.

_How did I end up here – all alone?_

Facing her fork in the road, April was forced to confront the ultimate question….

_Where do I go from here?_


	3. Fork in the Road

Chapter 2: Fork in the Road

_It was the toughest decision I had to make, but I knew she would have a better future than I could give her._

_It’s has been a tough road. Especially since the father totally bailed after I told him I was pregnant. But I couldn’t imagine my life without my son. He is the center of my world._

_Finances are pretty tight. I mean raising a child isn’t cheap. I’m lucky my mom babysits so I can work two jobs. My angel is so worth it though._

_I wasn’t ready to be a parent. Hell I was only 14! There was no way I wouldn’t have been a good mother. Adoption was the only sane option._

_Such selfish people who only think of themselves instead of the innocent baby. It’s not their fault you got knocked up. If you weren’t ready, you all should have kept your pants on!_

_I thought that adoption was the best choice but three years later and I still can’t stop thinking about her. I wonder what it would have been like to braid her hair and play dolls with her. Watch princess movies with her. Sometimes I feel like I made the wrong choice but it’s too late now._

_If you weren’t ready for the responsibility, you shouldn’t have whored yourself. This country is going down the shit-hole cuz of girls like you! Irresponsible tramps!_

So much for support. April banged her head against the keyboard, burying her face into her arms. There were indeed some websites that legitimately wanted to help girls like April. They monitored for trolls and had strict anti-bullying policies that were carefully moderated by active admins. Then there were the sites littered with trolls. Not just the annoying, roll-your-eye-at-their-stupidity type, but the really venomously mean, hateful type. The type who blamed you for being all that is wrong with the world today. The type you who wanted to judge you and your choices without knowing who you were. The type who were apparently holier than thou. It all made her head spin and blood boil. In the end, it didn’t matter. None the groups made figuring out what to do any easier. 

If she put the baby up for adoption, she would definitely be able to complete school without complications. Graduate and become a journalist. No distraction. No worries. No baby to wake her up at insane hours the night before a big exam. But was she being selfish? She would be putting herself before the baby. Or would she? If she can’t be a proper parent, what’s the point in keeping the baby? A caring couple who can’t have a baby would love to take care of hers, right? The baby would be far better off then. But is it a decision she would regret later? So many girls have turned around and had wished they kept their child. What if she did end up regretting her decision? What then?

A tear rolled down her cheek and splashed onto the desk. It almost felt like a “damned if you do and damned if you don’t” type of situation. Either way, she’ll have the emotional aftermath to deal with.

“Holy shit! Are you pregnant?!”

April’s head whipped up and banged into the mouth of her roommate. Her hands instantly grasped at the spot that has smashed into a set of teeth. She spun around and saw her roommate touching her lips and pulling her fingers back to check for blood. 

“I’m so sorry, Becca!” April quickly dried her eyes and rushed over to make sure the blonde girl was okay.

“Nah, it’s alright. Really! I shouldn’t have snuck up on you. I’m truly sorry about that. At least I’m not bleeding and no broken teeth!” Becca gave a bright grin to show she was perfectly fine despite her lips feeling a bit numb. Then her face dropped to a more concerned expression. “So what’s the deal with all those single mom forums, anyway? I mean, are you actually pregnant? Please tell me it’s a research project or something!”

A thick awkward silence settled into the room. April fiddled with her fingers a bit before releasing a heavy exhale and plopping onto her bed. She bit her lip as she struggled to figure out where to begin.

“Ok, what I’m about to tell you does not leave this room. Got it?!”

Becca eagerly took her spot on the bed, completely willing to lend her ears.

“You know how I have been battling that stomach bug?”

Becca slowly nodded.

“Well, I went in finally to get it checked out a couple days ago. Turns out, I actually am pregnant. That’s why I kept throwing up.”

“Does your dad know?”

April shook her head and sighed.

“I don’t know what to say to him. I’m still trying to figure out if I want to keep the baby or put it up for adoption. I keep going back and forth. I know it’ll be hard to finish school while taking care of a baby but what if I regret not keeping the baby. I just don’t know.”

“What about the father?”

“What about him?” April narrowed her eyes not really wanting to touch that subject.

Becca rolled her eyes. “Have you told him? Does he want to be involved? I mean it might help to know where he stands. You can get financial support if he’s the type who would man up. Or….”

“Or?”

“Well, you can just eliminate him from the equation and decide if you actually want to go through with the pregnancy.”

Red eyebrows furrowed together as April pondered in confusion at Becca’s little riddle.

“I’m not sure I’m following…”

April’s statement earned her an exasperated eye roll.

“I mean just terminate the pregnancy. Look, it’ll be like nothing ever happened. The procedures are so safe and easy now. And you won’t have a kid to hold you back. April, seriously, you have a bright future. You’re smart and a talented writer and so good with public speaking. And when you want to find something, you know how to dig for the information. You’ll be a great journalist. Don’t throw it away over one little bump in the road.”

An abortion? That thought never crossed her mind. Then again she never really gave much thought to the hot button issue as it was something she never thought would apply to her. But it was a logical solution….

“I never really considered that option.”

“Well, maybe you should. Look, I know you probably need time to think things over. Just let me know if you need anything. If you decide to go through with it, I’d be happy to drive you.” 

Becca gave a reassuring pat on April’s knee to which she only responded with a nod. After a couple minutes of silence, April excused herself to go for a walk. She really needed some fresh air and clarity.

* * *

Wafts of hot herbal tea assaulted her nostrils. Normally tea would soothe her nerves but today the scent was just nauseating. So April resorted to staring at the dark liquid in her cup. The steam danced around each other as the streaks rose from the cup and dissipated into the air. April replayed all her options in her head over and over: keep, adopt, or abort. She was so consumed in her thoughts that she almost didn’t register the waitress asking if her tea was okay.

“Huh? Oh yeah it’s fine. Just haven’t been that feeling well lately. I thought tea would help…”

The waitress smiled warmly at her. “Would you like some crackers? My mom always gave me Saltines when I had stomach issues. Always helped to calm it.”

“Um, sure, thank you.”

“Of course. I’ll be right back.”

April watched as the waitress left and disappeared into the kitchen area. As she returned her gaze back to her cup, April caught a glimpse of a curious set of eyes. It peeked out momentarily and disappeared quickly behind a tall man, whose back was facing April. The eyes peeked around again. Piquing her own curiosity, April tilted her head to the side to get a better view and locked her sights on the pair of deep chocolate brown orbs. The little boy gave a quick smile and disappeared again. April tilted her head further and when the little boy’s gaze met hers again, April swiftly retreated from his view. A joyful smile tugged at her lips as she heard his hysterical high pitched giggles. This time both April and the boy simultaneously tilted their head sideways. April cupped her hand and gave a small wave. The boy squealed in delight and waved back. The man turned around to see what the little boy was staring at and smiled when he saw April.

“His babysitter has red hair too. You probably remind him of her.”

“Oh really?” April replied sweetly still playing peek-a-boo with the toddler, who couldn’t contain his giddiness.

“You’re pretty good with kids. Bet you’ll be a good mother when you have your own.”

The statement caught April off guard. She her smile faded into dumbfounded shock but managed to mumble out a soft “Thank you.”

“Come on, buddy, time to go see Mama!” 

April stared as the man lifted the little boy out of the booster seat and into his arms. The woman who was sitting with the boy rose to join the father-son pair. April was not sure what overcame her, but she couldn’t stop herself from blurting out, “Hey wait!”

The man turned and stared at her curiously.

“You said you were going to see his mom. I know it’s none of my business but I thought she was the mom.”

This earned April a slight blush from the woman and a small chuckle from the man.

“It’s alright. I’m not with his mom anymore. We actually had already broken up when we found out she was pregnant. But we worked it out and we’re helping each other so we can raise Ryan together. It can be rough at times but Crystal,” he nodded toward his girlfriend, “has been supportive of our arrangement. And Ryan couldn’t be happier with all the love he gets. Isn’t that right?” He gave a little tickle on the boys stomach earning him cackles of laughter.

An adoring smile crept to April’s lips. The boy was so sweet and his father obviously made him the center of his universe. Was this arrangement also possible for April? Could they make it work too?

“Ryan say bye!”

Ryan raised a chubby hand and waved while clumsily mumbled, “b-bye.”

April waved back all the while dreaming what it would feel like to have a little one in her arms. The boy briefly reached out and brushed his soft hand against hers. Maybe he was trying for a high five. She couldn’t be sure, but the action still melted her heart causing tears to well up, instantly blurring her vision. Damn it! Will she ever run out of tears? April quickly wiped them away before they could fall - just in time for the waitress to return with her crackers.

* * *

Cracking the door open and peeking in, April was relieved to not find Becca in the dorm room. She didn’t care where she was but hoped she wouldn’t be back anytime soon. The social butterfly was no stranger to late nights out, which usually meant a nice quiet study area for April. But tonight, she needed the silence for other reasons. April sat down on her bed and pulled her phone out of her bag. She had finally decided to make the call – determined to get a definitive answer from him - but now that she was holding the phone in her hand, her resolve suddenly weakened. She fumbled with the contacts list and stared at the number. She hadn’t spoken a word to him since Christmas. How was she supposed to start? Would he want to talk to her?

As if her fingers had a mind of their own, her thumb pressed his number and the phone began dialing. Each dial seemed to last far too long with even longer bouts of silence in between.

_What do I say? Do I ask how he’s been first? Do I just cut to the chase and not beat around the bush?_

“Leave a message at the beep.”

_Oh shit! Voicemail!_

Beep!

“Uh…h-hey….um…Casey, w-we need to talk…”


	4. Road to the Unknown

Chapter 3 – Road to the Unknown

Screee! Blades scratched the ice as Casey danced around his opponents. His stick expertly guided the puck; his eyes stayed locked on the net. There…that’s his opening! The goalie shifted his position in anticipation of the shot, firmly positioning himself between Casey and the goal. A cocky smirk tugged the side of Casey’s mouth. Then, Casey suddenly veered the opposite direction, coming up to the now unguarded side of the net. He lifted his stick, and finally slapped the puck hard. Swoosh! Brrrr!

“Hell yeah! Suck it, boys!” He taunted while thrusting his pelvis in a highly suggestive victory dance.

Casey didn’t bother to hide the fact he was the best and the rest of the team could chew on their subpar, loser asses. Come on, he was the only freshman who got actual ice time. Everyone knew he was the backbone of the team, the rest just supported him…and they despised him for it. He didn’t care. As long as they kept winning, the team was forced to tolerate his antics.

“One of these days someone’s gonna knock you off that high horse of yours,” the team’s captain warned jokingly, slapping Casey a high five.

“Let them try, Johnny!”

“Good one, Jones,” the “opposing” goalie complimented. “Not sure where you got that kind of agility from.”

“All natural talent, man.”

“Alright, bring it in boys!” The coach ordered, concluding their scrimmage. After some final comments and game planning for the upcoming game, the team was dismissed for the night.

Casey pulled off his helmet and shook the excess sweat out of his hair. The wet strands clung to his forehead and cheeks. After entering the locker room and taking a seat on the bench, Casey ripped his gloves off, quickly untied the laces and yanked his skates off. He sighed in relief as his feet were freed from bondage. Next, his jersey and pads were discarded into one big sweat-soaked pile. Casey stared at his belongings, working up the motivation to actually change and go back to his dorm, but he was just so damn tired. 

_I shouldn’t have sat down._

But so long he wasn’t getting up, he may as well check in with his digital social life. Casey grabbed his bag and fished out his phone. The screen illuminated brightly, displaying his university’s logo set as his wallpaper, but then his heart skipped a beat as he noticed the missed call message.

_April?_

Casey stared at her name as a whirlwind of emotions swam through his mind. Longing. Sorrow. Excitement. Worry. Anxiousness. Why would she be calling? April made it quite clear that she never wanted to speak to him again. Maybe it was an emergency. She went to school in the city so she still ran into his family. Did something happen to his dad? Or his sister? Or maybe the Kraang were at it again…or the Foot…or both?! 

_Get a grip, Jones!_

A shaky exhale huffed out. He dug his fingers into his hair as he used his hand to support his head. It took several seconds of staring at the phone to realize that April had actually left a voicemail. Then he shifted his focus to stare at the voicemail alert but couldn’t seem to bring his finger to tap on the play button. For the last month, he had wished to hear her voice again but now he was caught up in fear of not knowing what was awaiting him.

_Would ya stop being a coward and just play it!_

As if his thumb heard the command, it pressed the voicemail alert and positioned the phone by his ear.

“Uh…h-hey….um…Casey, w-we need to talk…”

April’s voice shook, uncontrollably. Why was she so nervous? A long awkward silence followed.

“Look, there’s no easy way to say this….”

_Oh God! Someone must have died! Someone’s dead! Who died?!_

“…I’m pregnant…”

Whatever April may have said next had fallen on instantly deaf ears, bouncing off a mental wall. The auditory canal no longer received any input as his brain tried to process through the words. Finally the message ended Casey, however, had no idea what other information the message contained. He pressed replay and listened again.

“…I’m pregnant. I decided to go through with the pregnancy and will be raising the baby. I wasn’t sure what your feelings would be about how much you want to be involved but you at least deserved to know that you’ll be a father. Um, so if you could just call me back and we can talk about where you stand and all…um, yeah….well, b-bye.”

_Pregnant?! Baby?! Father?! But how?!_

“Everything okay, Jones?”

Casey nearly jumped out of his skin and yelped in a bit of an unnaturally high voice.

“Hey, man. Are you doing alright?” Johnny inspected his younger teammate in concern. A fresh round of sweat had beaded on Casey’s head. Avoiding Johnny’s gaze, Casey’s eyes shifted around nervously.

“Yeah, man, it’s cool. Everything’s fine.”

Casey quickly shoved his phone and gear into his pack and wordlessly rushed out of the locker room. The moment he stepped out, Casey was greeted by cold air stinging his wet face. Frost seemed to instantly crystalized on his long, albeit shorter than in high school, locks. He haphazardly flung his pack into the passenger seat and slammed the door as soon as he plopped into the driver seat. Sighing, he allowed his head to lightly bang against the steering wheel. For a few moments his head rested on the wheel and let out another miserable sigh. He tried to will his body to turn on the ignition and drive back to his dorm but hi body refused to move even an inch. 

_Damn it, Casey! You can’t just stay here all night!_

The moment he finally got the car in motion, the world around him became a blur. He somehow made it safely to the dorm’s parking lot though he couldn’t really remember driving the route. He pulled out the heavy bag but the weight did not compare to the burden that pulled on his heart. As he made his way to his room, Casey did not bother to acknowledge anyone around him even when his buddies called out “hey.” The blinders were firmly on – completely tunneled vision until he reached his room. Once he closed the door, Casey was ambushed from behind as a pair of slender arms snaked around his neck. Releasing a surprised gasp, Casey spun around nearly knocking his assailant to the ground.

“What the hell, Casey?!” The girl shrieked. Green eyes stared at him, mixed with surprise and anger. “I thought it would be cute to sneak in for some alone time. Guess I was wrong!”

“I-I,” Casey stammered at a loss for words. “Hailey, I’m sorry. I was just preoccupied. I didn’t even notice you were here.”

Hailey narrowed her eyes and stared at him almost as if trying to peer into his soul. Then she walked forward, swaying her hips seductively in the process, and once again wrapped her arms around his neck. 

“And what exactly was on your mind?”

“Family stuff,” he spat out a little to abruptly. “Uh, I really don’t wanna talk about it.”

“Oh…,” Hailey’s voice trailed off in disappointment. Then her eyes flashed a mischievous glint. “I can help get your mind off it, if you want.” She then leaned in and gently kissed his lips. She offered a few soft, brief kisses before deepening the kiss, sucking on his bottom lip. As her hands trailed down his chest, fingering down over is muscular torso, her fingers finally found their way to the zipper of his pants. Casey gasped against her kiss, inhaling some of his own saliva, and unceremoniously ended their session with a violent round of choking coughs.

“I’m – (cough) - sorry – (cough, cough) -” Casey covered his mouth into his elbow as he attempted to get his reflexes under control.

Hailey rolled her eyes and crossed her arms. “Real smooth, Hot Shot.”

“Look tonight is not a good night. You know there’s that nasty cold going around. My head’s been feeling fuzzy. There’s a chance I’m sick. Probably best you left, just in case.” Casey couldn’t have been more desperate to get rid of Hailey. Sometimes he’s wondered why he hadn’t kicked her out of his life yet.

_Because April dumped your sorry ass. And rightfully so._

One drunken night with the team led to a wild one night stand. That one night stand led to a weak conviction of morals which led to a few more one night stands. It wasn’t supposed to go anywhere. He planned on ending it – honest he was! After seeing April again reminded him what he loved about her. Loneliness was a piss poor reason to screw around with another girl but he couldn’t go back and change the past – only move forward. But then April found out because stupid Hailey had to send that one nude pic to remind him what he was missing. She probably was hoping I was with April and that she would see it! Manipulative bitch knew he had a girlfriend. So why was he still seeing Hailey? Simple – loneliness and an easy lay.

Hailey’s eyes softened with concern. “Ok, I’ll go, so long as you promise to rest and take care of yourself otherwise I will be back to make sure you get well.”

_Oh God no!_

“I promise,” he replied warmly before being attacked by another round coughs.

After Casey escorted Hailey out the door, he flopped onto his bed, snapped on his headphones, blasted Metallica, and downed himself in his thoughts.

\- Two Days Later –

The last puck dropped to the ice, releasing a loud echoing thud. Casey eyed the line of pucks and then measured his angle with the goal net. He skated back and readied his stance. With a hard push, he skated at top speed. Without a break, snapped his stick and slapped the pucks one after another in rapid succession. After he sent the last one through the air, the puck bounced off the metallic pole with a resounding ding echoing throughout the rink – just like the majority of the other pucks. Only two miraculously found their way into the net. With a furious roar, Casey slapped his stick against the ice a few times before flinging it halfway down the rink. He slumped over with his hands on his knees as he tried to get his breathing back under control.

“Wow! Such unsportsman-like conduct. That’s definitely time in the box.”

Casey’s head snapped up and spun around to catch Johnny staring intently at him.

“Why are you here?” Casey grumbled.

“Better question is why are you here…and why you’re not entering the penalty box? Let’s go, Jones.” Johnny signaled with a beckoning finger.

Casey impatiently rolled his eyes, earning him a stern growl from his captain.

“I ain’t bullshitting, Jones. Penalty box, now!”

This sudden change in tone caught Casey off guard causing his eyes to widen in confusion.

“What’s the deal, Johnny? I’m just practicing. You’re not even supposed to be here. This was a solo session.”

“You never lost composure like that before, Casey. Now, you’re gonna get over here and tell me what’s going on, or I’ll tell coach you can’t play the next game.”

Casey’s fists tightened as his eyebrows angrily furrowed. “You can’t do that!”

“I’m captain and you’re not. I won’t lose a big game against a rival school on account that you can’t think straight and focus on the puck. You’re normally like Tinkerbell on ice skates with a hockey stick instead of a magic wand. And I’ve never seen you miss an unguarded net. Your magic touch is obviously M.I.A. You don’t deserve to play right now. So we can either talk or your ass can warm the bench. Take your pick.”

A defeated sigh escaped Casey’s lips. He was left with no other choice. Without bothering to retrieve his stick, Casey skated toward the penalty box and took his seat like instructed.

“So?” Johnny prodded.

Casey slid his gloves off and rubbed his face as he gathered his thoughts.

“Just lots of personal stuff going on…”

“Like what? You and Hailey broke up? Honestly didn’t think you were so attached to her that you’d break down like this.”

“No, it’s not like that and we didn’t break up.”

“Family stuff?”

“Something like that…”

“Everything okay with your dad and sister?”

“Yeah,” Casey pinched his nose. Is Johnny really going to play a guessing game with him? “It’s complicated, Johnny, okay?! Look man, I really don’t think it’s your business. Just butt out?!”

“No,” Johnny remained unfazed by Casey’s tantrum. “Look, Casey, I have a kid who likes to meltdown in the middle of the store if I don’t buy every fucking thing he sees, and every pair of eyes just turn and watch the scene, judging my parenting skills, probably assuming I’m the worst dad in the world because I refuse to let him eat all the artificial, chemically, preservative filled, brightly colored cereal. And I don’t give shit about their judgment or my son’s temper. You better bet I can put up with your juvenile whining till hell freezes over. So now you decide how long we will be here.”

Casey was stunned silent. After knowing Johnny for a full semester and practicing with him, he never learned he was a father.

“You’re a dad?”

Johnny raised a curious eyebrow. “Yeah, and?....oh…”

The two young men silently stared at each other as Johnny’s mind raced to process Casey’s fixation on that one small detail.

“Casey?…Is Hailey pregnant?”

Deep brown eyes widened and then he tipped his head to the side in confusion. “N-no…why would you be asking…oh, that’s right, I never mentioned about April…”

“April? Who’s April?!”

“My girlfriend….well ex-girlfriend…back in New York.”

“Hold on! You had a girlfriend back home?”

Casey groaned, knowing he will need to provide a back story. “Long story short – we started dating in high school but we broke up over winter break…because she found out about Hailey….”

Johnny pinched the bridge of his nose as he pieced together the puzzle.

“Wow…I mean, wow! Never knew you were such a selfish jackass, Jones.”

Dumbfounded, Casey wasn’t sure if he should be pissed off and yell back at the insult or mope and just take the pain of the hard honest truth. Casey settled on lowering his eyes in shame and bottled up the impending hissy fit with arms crossed firmly on his chest.

“So what are you gonna do?”

Casey responded with a heavy sigh. “That’s what I’ve been wondering for the last two days.”

“Why is it so hard for you to decide, Casey? Not ready to give up the party life? To be anchored down by responsibilities?”

“It’s more complicated than that…”

“Because of hockey?” Johnny cut him off.

Casey could only blink at the seemingly psychic link Johnny had established with him.

“Sort of. I’m not trying to be selfish. I have no problems with saying ‘yeah I fucked up and need to man up,’ but I need to be able provide for the baby too. I can’t afford college without the scholarship. I need to stay here and play hockey to keep my scholarship, which takes me away from April and the baby. Or I can move back to New York, give up the scholarship and not afford a better life for my kid…either way the baby gets screwed in the deal…”

Johnny pat Casey’s back and offered his shoulder a sympathetic squeeze.

“Johnny, how are you doing it? Raising a kid and going to school?”

With downcast eyes, Johnny mumbled out the sacrifice of his loved one. “My mom moved up here to help me out. She stays home to babysit and then goes to work when I’m home. Kind of like a tag team effort.”

“What about your girlfriend…?”

Casey was cut off by Johnny’s venomous snort.

“That’s the ironic part, Casey. I originally suggested an abortion. We were too young to be parents. She said she couldn’t do it. It was a moral thing for her or whatever. Religious principles she was raised with. I was just gonna play hockey and finish school and move on while she was stuck with the baby. Then she texted a pic after Danny was born. I never saw anything so angelic in my life. Then I visited him and then started to help to support him. The next thing I knew she said she couldn’t do it anymore, that she couldn’t be a mom. She was too young and had too much to accomplish…and then she was gone and I was left with a baby to raise on my own. I don’t regret, really. I love my son. I’d do anything for him. Definitely didn’t seeing my life turning out this way, and I knew I couldn’t do it on my own.” 

Johnny smiled warmly as he thought about his toddler, who was waiting to see him return home. He then turned his gaze to Casey. 

“Look, man, I ain’t gonna tell you what’s the right thing to do. What’s right for me maybe isn’t right for you. All you can do is choose your path and discover the journey on your own. Good luck.” Johnny offered one more pat before leaving Casey alone in his thoughts.

. . . 

Throughout the ride home, Casey replayed his conversation with Johnny – the choices his friend had to make and the consequences of what was forced onto him. Casey replayed his choices – stay and play hockey and go pro or give it all up and move back to the city and be a responsible father. Was it possible to be a responsible father and still play hockey? Or was that too Utopian of a dream to make true? With a loud groan, Casey dropped his head hard against the keyboard.

“Ow!” he muttered but didn’t move a muscle until he was alerted by the sound of an incoming message. 

Casey whipped his head up to see a message screen. The first row contained indecipherable gibberish next to his name – probably the result of him hitting his head – though it seemed he erroneously sent the message to someone. The next line down said a simple “hello?” Casey stared blankly until the next message “Casey?” popped up next to the name “April.”

_April?!_

His heart stopped – or at least it felt that way. The heart didn’t literally stop in these situations, did it? Casey definitely felt the dry lump stuck in his throat and felt the fresh beads of sweat break onto his forehead. If this was divine intervention to force Casey to finally talk to April, then God was a cruel manipulator. Though it had been two days…there was only so long he could avoid the situation. Casey’s eyes shifted to the video chat icon. Was this one of those conversations that was best to have a real talk or could he get away with just chatting? Casey bit his lip has he deliberated. His fingers however were working faster than his brain; his hand reached for the mouse and the cursor hovered over the video icon and clicked. It didn’t take April long to accept the chat request, infiltrating Casey’s screen with the face of an exhausted blue-eyed, red-head. Dark bags hung under her eyes and she appeared more pale than normal, yet somehow she was still the most beautiful girl he had ever seen. The two wordlessly stared at one another; neither of them was sure who should start. Mustering up all his courage, Casey finally decided to break the silence.

“Hey, April…”


	5. Speed Bumps

Chapter 4: Speed Bumps

“Hey, April…”

Casey winced at the high pitched cracking in his voice but much to his relief, April didn’t seem to notice. Or she was too tired to acknowledge it. Casey stared into heavy lidded eyes rimmed with dark circles. Has she been getting any sleep? April sat hunched over her desk with one arm propping up her head while the other seemed to hug her stomach.

“You been feeling okay?” 

Casey bit his lip, pondering the stupidity of his question. April however responded with a weak smile almost as if she was grateful for the concern.

“The morning sickness has been awful. Some days I feel like I’m dying. And the guy who named it ‘morning sickness’ was a complete moron. It’s the morning, the evening, the middle of the night. And when I’m not puking, my stomach just feels all twisted and nauseated and it never seems to end.”

Never in the years he had known her had Casey seen April look so helpless. Her eyes pleaded for relief though was at a loss of where to find it. His heart broke for her. 

“Have you tried peppermint tea?”

A fine red eyebrow rose curiously. Casey responded with a most indignant eye roll.

“My mom drank a lot of peppermint tea when she was pregnant with my sister. I don’t know for sure but I think she drank it for the morning sickness. She always seemed to look better after she drank a cup.”

April rubbed her chin as she considered the information.

“What about things that she ate? I can’t seem to keep anything down.”

“She kept it simple at first. Easy to digest things. I remember lots of pasta during that time. I’m assuming it was about not eating heavy food that will upset her stomach like meats and fried food. Do you at least have crackers? You can pair it with peanut butter. It’s an easy to digest protein. Athletes use it all the time to energize before intense activity….”

Casey’s voice trailed off as he gazed upon wide, astonished, blue eyes.

“Don’t give me that look. Despite my pathetic high school GPA I actually do know things,” he announced smugly.

Shrugging her shoulders, April offered an amused smile.

“I suppose that’s why I was prescribed the vitamins. It’s like the only way I’m getting any nutrition into my body,” April huffed out, amusement replaced with frustration.

“It’ll get better. It usually ends with the first trimester…at least that’s what all the pregnancy books said.”

“You…read….the books?”

Rubbing the back of his head, Casey lightly bit his lip as his cheeks took on a rosy hue. “Yeah, well I was concerned about my mom so I actually read up on what she was going through. With my dad working a lot I had to help care for her so I had to learn about all that stuff. Have you done any research yet?”

Embarrassment stained April’s cheeks red as she shook her head.

“They have all sorts of information from how the pregnancy can progress. Different things you might experience. Stages of the baby’s development. Plus great pics and diagrams. I bet there’s a lot of it online too. Honestly I wish I could be there to help you out…”

April’s gaze fell away from the computer screen. Her finger nervously twirled strands that had fallen loose from her ponytail. She seemed to be struggling to find the words to voice the question but Casey decided to beat her to the punch.

“April, please look at me.”

Reluctantly, April obliged.

“This isn’t an easy decision…for any of us. I think it was very brave of you to choose to have the baby especially if you are continuing school….”

Tears instantly welled in her eyes. She blinked rapidly, attempting to hold the tears in.

“…I really want to be there with you, but if the baby is to have a better life, I need to finish school – get my degree. If there was a way I can move back and afford to finish school I would, really. In the end, it’ll be worth it for the baby.”

Skeptical eyes met his – full of doubt and tears, but too stubborn to allow them to spill. Too proud to admit she was relying on him.

“April, listen to me, please. I am here for you and the baby. I will support you both. But I can’t do it if I can’t get a decent job, ya know?”

“What am I supposed to do, Casey?” Casey flinched as she hissed at him. “I want to have a decent career too. I don’t want to drop out of school but I need to buy diapers somehow. I’ll have to juggle school and work because I’m sure as hell not going to work some dead end minimum wage jobs to make ends meet. So how are we supposed to make this work? How are we supposed to care for our baby?”

Biting his lip Casey was at a loss for words – not an easy task for someone used to having the last word. School and hockey took up all of his time. There was literally no downtime for anything else.

_Then where do you find the time to go out partying, dumbass?_

_But those are different. The equivalent time doesn’t add up to a livable wage of any sorts. Doesn’t even count as part-time work._

“I’ll look for work during the off season, but in the meantime, my dad sends me money. It’s supposed to be for personal items like soap, deodorant, stuff like that. I’ve been pissing most of it away on beer and other stupid shit. I really don’t need most of it. I can start sending it your way. You can save it or use it as you need during the pregnancy. Not sure if you had to pay for the vitamins, but anyway, it’ll be a start for now until I can figure out something better.”

A heavy sigh permeated through the speakers. April lightly bit her lip and batted her eyes rapidly, fighting the tears. Casey couldn’t look at the screen, couldn’t watch April break down. To surrender to her fears and insecurities.

“April, please understand. In the long run, this is the right decision. I need you to understand that I will be there for you…always…even if I can’t be physically there for you right now…”

“Will you ever be?!”

Casey froze, instantly speechless…for the second time in a night. His brows furrowed in confusion as he racked his brain trying decode April’s words.

“Face it, Casey,” April bit out through quivering lips. “You may be trying to convince yourself that you’re doing your part by sending child support, but that’s not going to make you a father…”

“April…” he attempted to reach out calmly.

“…When you’re done with college and get drafted – become a hot shot hockey player – you’ll never be around…”

“April…” Casey’s lips pressed thin. His leg bounced rapidly under his desk as his patience ran thin.

“…You’ll be too busy traveling and you’ll never be home. You may as well not be in the baby’s life.”

“Enough!”

Casey’s stomach sunk as soon as he screamed into the microphone but it got April to finally shut up for a bit. He avoided looking at the computer lest should looks indeed kill. In that moment, he would not be able look at her without glaring razor sharp daggers.

“Look, I get it,” he strained to keep in control. “I’ve made bad choices and have proven that I make less than honorable choices. But I refuse to be labeled a deadbeat dad. I do know how to step up and take ownership of my mistakes. I actually do understand responsibility. Yeah, I will need to work. Maybe I will become a hockey player and will be traveling a lot but there’s businessmen who is never home. There are dads who are always home but spend the day drinking their life away and abuse their kids. I don’t know what my future holds. But I need to do my best to create a good life for my kid. I will not raise my kid in the ghetto, living paycheck to paycheck, not like how my dad did. I got lucky that I had a natural talent and I will not let that go to waste. There are plenty of athletes who are great dads. I intend to be the best father I can be but I will not let you look down on me for choosing to complete my education…”

A derisive snort echoed read his ears. Casey finally raised his gaze and glared at the monitor. Fiery red eyebrows knitted together, matching her crossed arms. April’s blue eyes stared back - doubt on full display.

“What?” Casey spat out like poison.

“Do you really think you’ll make it through college?”

Casey’s molars ground against each other as he clenched his jaw tightly.

“Excuse me?”

“What’s your GPA right now? Last time I saw you, all you talked about was all the parties you’ve been to and how easy it’s been to sneak in beer into the dorms. Do you even study? Though considering all your free time is spent fucking random sluts…”

The laptop jumped as white knuckled fists slammed hard against the desk. April instantly went silent as she stared wide eyed at Casey’s darkened expression. Casey pressed his lips firmly and tapped his fingers against the wood as he fought to regain composure.

“I can’t do this right now, April. We can’t do this. I have every intention about being a part of the child’s life whether you like it or not. You need to learn to bury the past otherwise we are going to have one hell of a bumpy road trying to raise a happy kid when the parents keep clawing at each other’s throat. Ball’s in your court, April.”

Before she could respond, Casey maneuvered the mouse over the “end” button and disconnected the video chat. The air grew thick around him as he tilted his head back and stared at the ceiling. His blood boiled as he replayed April’s accusations – the lack of faith thick in her voice. Was this the cycle he was doomed to live? Trying to prove his worth only to be beat back down for one mistake? Was this his penance to pay for his sin? If he was doomed to live this hell, it’s not a healthy life for a child to be raised in, surrounded by bitterness and hatred. Surely April must realize this as well.

Casey gasped as the thought came to his mind. His snapped his head up to be greeted by his own reflection on the blackened screen. April would never allow her kid to be raised in a perpetual hell of endless bickering. That’s far more damaging than being raised by a single parent working multiple jobs. His boiling blood ran ice cold as he contemplated the ramifications. Casey then shot out of his chair, yanked the zipper of his gym bag open, and fished for his cell phone. As soon as it landed in his hand, Casey hastily inputted the phone number and pressed dial. Two rings later, his called was answered.

“Hey! Uh, long story but…I need a HUGE favor….”


	6. U-Turn

Chapter 5 – U-Turn

Warm swirls of steam gently brushed against her flushed cheeks. The touch was like a welcoming embrace as she sought refuge from the brutal cold. Winter was always magical during Christmas but in February it was a frigid nuisance and only God knew when spring would actually arrive – especially with a fresh round of snow being a common occurrence.

April inhaled deeply, savoring the salty aroma of the miso broth. The noodles floated lazily in the liquid along with little slices of green onion and half a hard-boiled egg – all of which remained untouched. All she could do was stare into the bowl where her faint, obscured reflection stared back.

“You’ve been awfully quiet, April-chan.”

The familiar voice roused her from her thoughts and she locked her gaze on Mr. Murakame. It always mystified her how the old man masterfully chopped, sliced, and fried while his world was consumed in a perpetual darkness. Despite his lack of sight, Mr. Murakame possessed heightened skills in perception, always able to sense other people’s moods, honing in on subtle clues to one’s well-being. 

“What is on your mind?”

A deep sigh escaped her lips as she lowered her gaze back to the soup. Where could she possibly begin?

\- A few days prior –

Two days had passed since she had spoken with Casey. She still couldn’t sit in front of the computer screen without feeling bitter over things ended. Deep down she wanted to believe he meant well but couldn’t shake her doubt about his commitment to being a proper father. Instead she felt as though she would be his charity case. At least she was confident that the baby would be provided for…assuming of course Casey never injures himself and actually gets drafted. Hockey was such a brutal sport. Players were benched constantly for one injury or another. Then where would they be?

_No! This isn’t you, April! You’ve always been able to take care of yourself. You’ve lived through alien invasions, battled robotic ninjas, befriended giant mutant turtles, traveled through time and space and still, watched your father mutate not once but twice, and still managed to graduate from high school. Anyone else would have crumbled under that kind of stress but you rose above that. You can get through this!_

Yet no matter how much she tried to convince herself of her own strength, her thoughts were always permeated with what kind of future she could realistically provide for a baby. Child care was expensive. She couldn’t afford it without a job, which also meant splitting her focus between school, work, and child. The more she thought about, the more her head spun, the more she wanted to cry. April thought about reaching out to her father, but it wasn’t fair to unleash her problems onto him. Sure he was a psychologist and it was his job to sort out people’s issues, but all the run-ins with the Kraang left him a broken man. He never quite recovered from the abductions and the mutations. The endless cycle of mental torture which time never healed. She couldn’t drag him into this – not when she had a permanent way out.

So here she stood – a block away from her destination. Her hot breath swirled in the cold air as she walked briskly. Time was precious and the sooner this was over the sooner she could move on with her life. Her heart raced - nervous yet relieved at the same time – as she rounded the last corner…

“Thou shalt not kill!”

April halted abruptly, feeling like she ran into a wall. It may as well have been with the horde of people blocking the street leading to the clinic. Because of the raised posters, the door was concealed from view. If she had any hope of making it inside, she would need to force her way through. April inhaled slowly as she tried to still her thuming heart. She bit her lip and pressed forward. 

As she ventured closer to the protesters, angry accusations of murder along with the promise of God’s wrath for her sinful acts rang in her ears seemingly louder than the honking from annoyed New Yok cab drivers. April tried to keep her gaze forward, locking sights on her target. However, as if on their own accord, her eyes caught glimpses of the various signs. Some were meant to provide comfort and warm through Christ’s embrace, but somehow the image felt patronizing. Others definitely were meant to make you feel like the worst human being in existence. One such poster drew her attention, and she slowed her place to study it. Staring back at her was a little head – no, it was only a portion of the head - sitting on a silver tray. On the same tray, an arm accompanied the head. Medical tools presumably used in the fetal extraction also occupied space on the tray. From her peripheral vision, another poster had the picture of a pregnant woman. As if one possessed x-ray vision, her abdomen displayed the baby in her womb. The child was beautiful unlike the grotesque display in front of her. 

Was this what it would look like? Was this the fate for her occupant in her womb? Did the baby even have a form yet? April gasped sharply as she realized that she really hadn’t the faintest clue what the baby should look like now. She had the general concept that the embryo was a clump of cells while the fetus actually looked like a human with functioning organs. Did the baby have a heart beat yet? Or neurological activity? Did the baby have emotions or was able to sense April’s emotions? She was more than halfway through her first trimester and she knew nothing about the baby she helped to create…except that the baby was responsible for all of the horrid “morning” sickness. That was really the only indication she had that the baby even existed - and here she stood ready to have it removed. What if the baby could feel pain? Would the baby suffer during the process? What if the baby really was yanked out part by part?! A wave of nausea overcame her – almost losing her breakfast on the spot! Deep in the pit of her stomach fear clutched hold and slowly spread up to her heart, twisting it painfully. Tears stung her eyes and her hands shook uncontrollably. Then she began gasping as if someone was strangling her. She shouldn’t be here! What was she doing?!

Developing a mind of its own, her feet suddenly took control, spinning her 180 degrees. She shoved through the crowd as they chanted the praise of their heavenly savior. Whether it was divine intervention or her embarrassment of not being fully educated about her condition, April only knew one thing – she did not belong here!

\- Present Day –

Since that day April had her first official obstetrician appointment. She learned she was a little over two months along. One more month and she’ll be exiting the first trimester. The baby, based on what the online pics showed, didn’t exactly look human – kind of like an alien – but had two arms and two legs. Additionally, the baby would have a nose, mouth, and lungs. And brainwaves! Neurological activity had kicked in already! April couldn’t help but feel guilty about that aspect. What if the baby was psychic like her? Could the baby read her thoughts and experience her emotions? Did the baby fear or even knew about what almost occurred? And if the baby did, would he or she hold it against her?

April sighed deeply as tears once again stung her eyes. But then she smiled as she remembered the appointment. The cold gel was bothersome but something she would have to get accustomed to. It would be worth it though. To be rewarded with the sound of the heartbeat was a surreal experience. At first, she wasn’t sure what she was hearing – just a constant whooshing sound. 

“That’s the baby’s heart,” she had been informed.

It didn’t sound anything like what she heard all those times she rested her head against Casey’s chest or when she sat in her father’s lap during bedtime stories. The doctor assured her that it really was the heart and boy did it beat fast! Apparently that was good. Strong, healthy, and fast. For once April had to acknowledge she really had a living being inside of her. Somehow it brought closure knowing she was determining the fate for not just herself but for another person as well. However, it also saddened her that she almost chose to end that life. Actually, she felt horrid. What kind of mother kills her baby? For the first time since she was informed of her pregnancy, April finally knew how she felt about the situation - well at least she knew she couldn’t go through with the abortion. And now that she heard the beating heart, she was forever connected to the life growing in her. But how to make it all work out was a dilemma she still needed to sort out…

“You’ve been awfully quiet, April-chan. What is on your mind?”

April sighed and gazed up at the old chef. The man may have been blind but he saw into her soul quite easily. His face graced a concerned fatherly demeanor along with a warm smile to comfort her.

“I’ve just had a lot on my mind lately. Got a lot going on with school and just life in general. I just need to figure out which direction I’m heading. That’s all.”

Mr. Murakame nodded in understanding. “You know, in life you cannot always plan everything. Sometimes part of the journey is finding yourself on the side roads to new experiences. Then some of the best memories derive from wandering without direction. That is why life is an adventure. And every once in a while as you head toward your destination you catch a glimpse of something wonderful and you must make that u-turn just so you don’t miss a single opportunity. Do not let your goals make you lose sight of the many gifts life has to offer.”

Narrowing her eyes, April wandered if Mr. Murakame possessed a sixth sense (or would it be fifth for him since he lacked in sight?), secretly knowing about her precious little gift. April thanked Mr. Murakame for his advice and finally found her appetite to finish her noodles.

. . .

The wind swirled all around, pushing her sideways so that she couldn’t walk a straight path. A storm was surely approaching and she couldn’t wait to be back in her dorm, buried deep in her comforter. Maybe if she’s lucky there would be a snow day. It wouldn’t be impossible in February to have such an occurrence. All she needed was one day to just rest. And warmth. Good thing she was not much further from her subway station.

“Evening, Miss,” a voice called out from the shadows ahead of her.

April halted instantly and slowly began walking backwards.

“Miss, wait,” the man emerged from the shadows. He was clean shaven and dressed like any regular Joe you would pass on the street. “I lost my wallet. My train pass was in it and I have no money so I can’t get home. Please, if you have any money, I just need enough to buy a ticket. Or just hail a cab.”

The more April walked back the more the man approached her. He stayed calm the entire time but the sickening feeling of foreboding settled in her stomach. Her hands trembled even though they were clutched into tight fists.

“Sorry, I don’t have money. I’m just a poor college kid.”

“Oh come on. You wouldn’t be out if you didn’t have cash to get back home. I don’t need much. Just little cash will do.”

“Sorry. I got nothing.”

April quickly spun on her heels to make a quick break for it but froze when second man appeared from the alley.

_Shit!_

Her heart pounded hard. Thump, thump! If it had only been the one guy, she could have ran. She had the endurance from her training. But both guys? Sure she had taken on Foot soldiers, hell even multiple Foot bots but with her condition – the nausea, the poor diet, lack of energy. What if the baby got hurt in the process?

The two men continued to approach though their pace have now quickened. April desperately sought an exit. Could she make a break for an alley, lose them, and take refuge in the sewer until she was safe again? There wasn’t enough time for her to figure it out!

Her concentration broke when the grotesque sound of metal cracking across the face echoed into her ears. She turned in time to see one man collapse to the ground, the trash lid clattering noisily as it spun on its rim until it reached a complete stop. The original man who called out to her pulled out a switch-blade and stood defensively, surveying his surroundings. However, the man failed to hear the shadowy figure creeping up from behind. A large hand gripped tightly around the weapon wielding arm while another muscular arm swiftly applied pressure on the man’s elbow, forcing the predator to open his hand and drop the knife. Never loosening the confinement around the wrist, the rescuer lifted the pressure off only to reconfigure the man’s position and delivered a sharp elbow to the middle of the man’s face, instantly rendering him unconscious. A sigh of relief escaped April’s lips as her knees grew week from all the excitement. She leaned against a light pole for support.

“You okay?” Concern soaked his normally nonchalant “I don’t give a damn” voice.

April nodded weakly. Her gaze met deep emerald eyes as Raphael stepped closer to the light emanating from the lamp. She never quite figured out how giant turtles managed to stay concealed in a city as well-lit as New York City.

“Are you sure?” Raphael prodded, seeming to scan her from head to toe. Instantly feeling self-conscience, April wrapped her coat tighter around her body and glared in annoyance. Sensing her unease, Raphael blushed and averted his eyes. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to stare. I just couldn’t live with myself if something happened to you…or the baby.”

Her eyes snapped wide open. Her mouth dropped open. April felt like a gaping fish as she searched for words to express…shock? anger? disbelief? Perhaps it was a mix of all three. At any rate, how could he possibly…?

“Casey told you, didn’t he?” Blues eyes narrowed accusingly as she crossed her arms, partially in defense but mostly because she was cold.

Raphael nodded completely unfazed by April’s attitude. “Casey’s my best friend. Of course he told me about what’s going on. But it wasn’t just to gossip. He was worried about you.”

April’s cold demeanor thawed at those words. Her face softened and her arms relaxed.

“He called me up that night he video chatted with you. He told me how the conversation didn’t go well. And he was worried about you and the baby’s well-being and he asked if I’d keep an eye on you…”

“Hold on,” April raised a hand to signal you Raphael to pause. “Have you been following me? It’s not a coincidence that you were here tonight?”

His blush deepened. The turtled looked like a child caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

“Ok, I admit, I’ve been keeping tabs on you. But in all honesty it was good that I was following you tonight.”

April rolled her eyes but smiled at the smug jerk.

“Look, April, I know things didn’t end well between you and Casey and things have been…tense. He told me about how you didn’t believe he wanted anything to do with the baby. But you need to know that when Casey vows to do something, he sticks to it. He says he will support his child and be present, then he will find a way to somehow make good on his promise. You know Casey has always made good on his word…”

“Couldn’t make good on his word to be faithful,” she pointed out, spitting venom into the words.

“Yes, he screwed up – big time! I get it! I really do but just give the guy a chance. He might actually surprise you. Please, just talk to him.”

Raphael turned to seek refuge once again in the shadows but stopped when April called out to him.

“Did you follow me a few days ago…to the clinic?”

The pause was much longer than April would have desired. She knew the answer, but she still wanted to hear it from his mouth. Raphael turned slightly so that they made eye contact.

“Yeah, I did.”

“Are you…are you going to tell him that I almost…”

“Nah,” he cut her off. “There’s no need for that, right? I mean, is that still an option for you?”

April firmly shook her head. “I won’t be going back there. Are you going to tell Casey?”

“Ain’t my business.”

“Have you told anyone else about me? Your brothers?”

“Nope. Again that ain’t my business. However…it won’t be long until you start showing, uh, you know. It’s only a matter of time before the wrong people know about you. The Foot is still around. While the Kraang seem to be gone, we know those bastards are persistent. They have found ways to hide before. There’s a reason they have been on this planet for thousands of years. We’d be naïve to think they are gone for good. Despite the occasional waves of calm we’ve had, there’s always a persistent danger. What if the Kraang caught wind that one of their own experiments is now pregnant? What do you think that would mean for the child? Face it April, it’s a matter of time before you will need to tell us. I suggest you talk to at least Leo sooner rather than later.”

April bit on her lower lip as she contemplated his words. Raphael was right (she kind of hated it when he was) but it would be a while before she was ready for that conversation. So she offered a nod of understanding before the two parted ways. Though unbeknownst to the two, a dark figure sat deep in the dark stillness, hearing every word uttered. A smile graced his lips, knowing he had acquired significant “game changing” information.

A/N: Ok! Couple of things I want to nip in the bud before people comment. #1 – those who know basic embryology knows that April’s basic knowledge was not accurate. I did that on purpose to show that she was not fully educated on the subject and had not taken any steps to know what was going on in her. #2 – I hit a hot button issue and I know some people will not agree with the end result of the decision (and some of you will agree). This chapter was not to get into that issue or take a side. This was about April’s choices and the decisions she makes and where that road goes next. Being that I have had several significant scenes preplanned far in advance, obviously the story has to progress a certain way. I originally never planned on exploring the concept of abortion but having seen too many protests in my local area and that I had mentioned it briefly as a suggestion to April in previous chapters, I decided it felt right to write about it in this chapter. Can’t wait to write the next chapter…after I get caught up on the other fics! Until next time…!


	7. In The Driver's Seat

Chapter 6: In the Driver’s Seat

He walked with a skip in his step. The smile that had pulled on his lips the minute he learned the news still had not disappeared. He wrung his hands together like a greedy villain eying the crown jewels.

_This changes everything. The table has finally turned! This information is absolutely life altering!_

Biting his lip lightly, he mulled over how to break the biggest news of the century. He had to choose his words wisely. He couldn’t just blurt these types of facts out….

“Oomph!”

His head smacked hard against an equally hard object, sending a blinding pain through his skull. Gingerly, he rubbed his forehead.

“Seriously, Mikey, you need to watch where you’re going.”

He looked up to find Leonardo rubbing his own throbbing head. Flashing a classic sheepish smile, the ever distracted Michelangelo offered an apology. 

“Sorry, Leo. I was just…deep in thought.”

Leonardo quirked a curious eyebrow.

“More like head in the clouds as always,” he chuckled. “Just stop running into people. Seriously, sometimes I wonder how you have survived this long in life. You’re ADHD is really your own worst enemy.”

Michelangelo performed an exaggerated eye roll. While not completely untrue, he was pretty sick of being reminded that everyone viewed him as the weak link of the clan. While overly prone to the simplest distraction, Michelangelo had proven numerous times he was indeed a high level ninja. Besides this situation was different, and he badly wanted to defend himself but was forced to bite his tongue for now. So he responded with an indifferent shoulder shrug and walked past Leonardo. Keeping a slow gait, Michelangelo waited for Leonardo’s footsteps to exit the lair and fade away into the distance before quickly bee-lining for the laboratory. Leonardo wouldn’t be back the rest of the night (actually he’s been quite scarce these days) and there was no reason to believe Raphael would be home anytime soon, so Michelangelo knew he would have plenty of alone time with his favorite brother. 

He stopped right before the entrance as to not alert Donatello of his presence. With Donatello’s face shielded behind his welding mask and blow torch blazing against metal, Michelangelo smirked slyly at the opportunity to have a little fun. He tip-toed forward careful not to trip over any of the various tools scattered on the floor. Closer he approached. Silently like any good ninja. He reached out to jab his fingers under his brother’s arm….

“Do it and I’ll torch you, Mikey,” Donatello warned in a dangerously calm, albeit muffled, voice.

Michelangelo’s face dropped as he let out an exasperated groan. 

“How did you even know I was here?”

“Your shadow,” the observant turtle pointed to Michelangelo’s shadow casting up the Shellraiser. “What do you want anyway? I know you didn’t just come in to scare the crap out of me. So, what do you want? I have a lot of repairs to perform.”

“Got some news for you!” Michelangelo chirped, back to boyish giddiness.

“What kind of news?” Donatello didn’t even bother to try to feint interest.

“Well…April’s pregnant.”

The blow torch stopped but Donatello remained still. Michelangelo continued to stare at his back as if he would somehow develop x-ray vision and watch the wheels in Donatello’s head turn. The laboratory developed an unnaturally eerie calm for far too long. Finally Donatello shook his head out of his reverie.

“Good for her,” came Donatello’s sarcasm soaked response. “Why are you even telling me anyway. It has nothing to do with me.”

Michelangelo’s jaw dropped. Did he really just hear that correctly?

“You’re kidding, right, Donnie?! I mean, after all, you might be the father!”

Donatello finally ripped his mask off his face and sent a cold glare at his brother. As he studied Michelangelo’s stupefied expression he began to wonder why he ever entrusted any secrets to the dense brother.

\- Two Months Prior –

The trance finally started to recede, stealing away all illusion he had of had started as the most magical night of his life. He was in heaven while embracing her warm body against his and inhaling her intoxicating scent. However when she pulled away and casted him out, it was like a stab in the chest. His blood ran cold – colder than the crisp winter air. While he complied with April’s request to leave her room, Donatello couldn’t really remember how he stumbled back to the sewers. He was completely on autopilot until he reached the lair. As he approached the entrance, his breath had caught in his throat. He had no idea if anyone was awake but he wasn’t going to take chances. He couldn’t bear having to explain where he had been…or why. Therefore, Donatello keep to the shadows and tip-toed all the way to the bathroom.

After stripping off all his gear, Donatello cranked the shower to full blast. Hot water burned against his cold skin yet it did little to warm his soul. He felt numb; his mind blank – a rare occurrence for the brain that never rest. The steamy air opened his sinuses forcing him to inhale April’s lingering scent.

“Fuck my life,” he mumbled under his breath as he scrubbed the soap bar aggressively over his body. Though no matter how much he lathered, her scent clung tight to him. Donatello swore that he would go mad if he couldn’t strip every last evidence of April off his skin. She refused to leave – engraved in his mind and on his body. Balling his fist around the soap, Donatello pounded the shower wall, releasing an enraged grunt. He sharply sucked in air and shakily exhaled but breathing could not to calm him. Then the tears threatened to well up. He blinked them away, refusing to shed a single one for her.

Finally giving up cleansing himself, he shut the water off and pulled the curtain back but froze from surprise. Sitting on top the toilet lid, Michelangelo blue eyes met Donatello’s gaze. Neither spoke for the longest time. Donatello didn’t even move a muscle. He wanted to retreat back behind the curtain but also didn’t want to make his shame obvious. So he resigned to stand like a statue until Michelangelo offered him a towel.

“What do you want,” Donatello asked curtly as he grabbed the towel and began drying himself.

“You were gone all night.”

Donatello narrowed his eyes suspiciously. It wasn’t a question. His absence was noticed.

“I saw you sneaking back in. Where have you been? It’s not like you to just disappear without leaving a note…well except for that time you went alone to rescue April’s dad from the Kraang.”

Michelangelo weakly chuckled at the memory. Once he noticed Donatello’s furious blush and teary eyes, Michelangelo expression changed to concern. 

“Donnie…?”

“It’s nothing…”

“Don’t lie to me, Donnie. You’re upset. I actually did hear you curse in here. Potty-mouth is Raph’s thing, not yours.” Michelangelo smiled weakly at his own joke, hoping to lighten the atmosphere a bit. Donatello’s gritted teeth immediately signaled him that had been a bad idea. “Come on, D, I know you too well. You can talk to me about anything.”

Releasing a heavy sigh, Donatello gave in. “Fine, but not here.”

Michelangelo nodded his understanding, scooped up his brother’s belongings, and followed him back to Donatello’s bedroom. After silently closing the bedroom door, Michelangelo plopped onto the bed and waited eagerly for the story though he was not prepared for the woeful tale of sex and heartbreak. Michelangelo’s expression saddened as he listened as Donatello recalled the blissful sensation of losing his virginity only to have his heart ripped out and stomped on. Michelangelo’s heart sunk to the pit of his stomach as he watched his brother breakdown, crying out his rage, sorrow, and betrayal. He wanted to reach out and hug his brother but was unsure if Donatello even wanted to be touched at that moment. For once he was at a loss of words, unable to think of a way to console his brother. So he bit his lip and just listened though his mind slowly drifted back to that night at the farmhouse when he had warned April against tugging on heartstrings. Then his mind suddenly snapped back to reality when Donatello mumbled incoherently under his breath.

“Huh?” Michelangelo asked.

“I’m done,” Donatello spat out. “I refuse to be April’s lovesick puppy. I finally understand that she’ll never return my feelings. I may never be able to stop loving her but I won’t the fool who keeps chasing her. I’ve played that game too long. It ends now.” 

\- Present Day – 

He hated to admit it but Donatello was still in love with the harlot. She continued to permeate his thoughts constantly. His dreams were invaded by visions of her soft pale skin and soft moans. Every once in a while he swore he could still smell her perfume. He cursed himself for not being able to let her go. Yet he held true to his vow and he never spoke of her or sought her out. To distract himself, Donatello buried himself deep in his inventions, seeking ways to evolve his ninja arsenal. It was now his sole focus in life.

“Why are you even telling me this? This has nothing to do with me.”

Michelangelo’s jaw dropped, dumbfounded.

“But…D! They always say it only takes one time. There is a chance you’re the father…”

“No, there isn’t Mikey!” Donatello groaned out. He really wanted to smack some sense into his brother but refrained from physical violence. “We’re different species!”

Michelangelo stared at him blankly as if Donatello was speaking a foreign language. 

“But..everything…fits together...right?”

Donatello’s face faltered as he tried to maintain his composure through his frustrations.

“Mikey, what don’t you understand about us not being the same species? April and I are genetically incapable of having kids together. That baby is Casey’s!”

Michelangelo still stared, baffled by the explanation. Donatello sighed, calming his nerves enough to grit out the biology lesson.

“Mikey, humans and turtles don’t share the same chromosome number. That distinctly separates us as species. Even if our sperm could fertilize a human egg, the embryo won’t develop. It’s the very definition of the word species. Just look at the horse and donkey. They are similar enough to create a mule but that mule is sterile and won’t be able to conceive an offspring. The greater the genetic difference, the greater the improbability for conception to occur.”

Donatello thought he had sufficiently, and simplistically, explained the science until Michelangelo blurted out, “Are you sure about that?”

Donatello slapped his palm to his forward.

“I’m done with this conversation. April and Casey deserve each other and I wish them all best with parenthood, but none of this is any of my business.”

Donatello flung his mask onto his work bench and hurried out of the laboratory, retreating to the bathroom for a hot shower. As he stood under the steamy water, he closed his eyes and tried to relax away his tension. The frustrations of having an unintelligible discussion with Michelangelo took its toll on him. Or was it because the wound from April’s manipulation was still too fresh on his memories. No matter how much he tried to forget the redhead, she always found a way to infiltrate his mind - even by the smallest memento that triggered flashbacks. The worst were to complete invasion of his subconscious as his dreams replayed that fateful night. Some nights the dreams felt so real, he woke up in a sweaty bed with a racing heart and the most painful erection with no satiable way to fulfill his desires. Her freckled, naked form forever etched into his memory. No matter how hard he wanted to forget, she refused to let him, and he hated himself for being so weak to stay entranced by her.

_She may be forever imprinted on me, but I refuse to let her control my life. I am taking back the wheel._


	8. Dead End

Chapter 7: Dead End

“Ugh!”

April’s stomach churned violently. The constant morning sickness had finally started to settle but the awful stench of the sewers forced bile into her throat. Weird considering this was not her first visit into the smelly underworld yet the odor seemed worse than normal today. Something about the pregnancy made her senses extra sensitive. Flavors had become so overwhelming that foods she used to love became major aversions. April seemed more aware of her surroundings though she started suspecting that it was maternal paranoia – especially with recent close call. Then there was smell, scents she at one time barely registered seemed to easy invade her nostrils now. April covered her nose in hopes to block some of the putrid, moldy aroma out. Was it even safe for her to be down here? Oh how did she even let Casey talk her into this?

\- A week prior -

She was still trembling the next morning – the attempted attack still fresh in her mind. Due to her hands constant shaking, the orange juice trembled in the cup, nearly sloshing over the rim. Raph’s words had cycled through her dreams – the warnings of the Kraang, the need to take preventative measures, the thoughts of breaking the news to the others! 

But she couldn’t. While Raph was giving sound advice to be sure she and her baby were protected, April just wasn’t ready to share the news with other people yet. Oh who was she kidding? If it was just her telling Leo, it would be a much simpler task. Donnie though…he was a different story. She hadn’t spoken to him (well any of them really) since that night. April knew she broke his heart, and she wasn’t sure if she could face him just yet. Hell she couldn’t even bear to look at him when she kicked him out of her room. She was a coward then, and she had no idea if she could muster the courage now. 

Letting out a loud groan, April gathered her belongings and marched down to the shower. Hot water usually does the trick to relax tension and melt away stress. Today all it did was remind her how she felt that night after using Donnie for her own gain. It wasn’t enough that she had already felt like a dirty whore after finding out she was not Casey’s only girl. After Donnie…she couldn’t stand looking herself in the mirror. She didn’t so much feel dirty but rather a treacherous bitch. What else would describe someone who betrays the trust of a friend? Could she even call Donnie a friend anymore? For all she knew April was dead to him.

A soft sigh slipped between her lips as the hot water cascaded down her body. She rubbed the soap bar in circular motions over her skin. Pregnancy sure has a strange effect on the mother-to-be. April’s skin seemed softer. Her normally thin, limp red locks were stronger and fuller. As her hand trailed down her front to her stomach, she slowed the circular motion to study the small bump protruding from her once flat abs. Each day the pregnancy became more real, more tangible, as the physical evidence grew. Seriously – literally growing! Her breasts were huge! She had already changed her bra size once and was seriously considering those adjustable maternity bras – garment that grows with the pregnant mom. She had yet to actually feel the baby though, or at least she thought she hasn’t yet. April finally took Casey’s advice and began reading the expectant mother books. While at times the wealth of information was overwhelming and was turning her into a stressed-out worrier, she did pick up on helpful information like the fact the baby was so small that movement might feel like gas bubbles. For all she knew the baby could be having a party in the womb and she would be none-the-wiser. Her thoughts drifted to what the baby might be like when she finally got to meet him…or her. Would the baby have black hair like Casey or red like hers? Freckles? Dimples? Athletic? Stubborn? For sure stubborn! Baby wasn’t going to escape the combination of persistent determination both parents offered.

A weak smile pulled on her lips and tears trickled down her cheek at the thought that her baby will always be in danger. It can’t be helped. Such was the fate of an O’Neal child. April quickly finished her shower and hurried back to her room. That’s another thing she needed to consider – living arrangements. Not the best idea to raise a baby in a college dorm in a shared room. With the flood gates fully opened, tears forced their down her cheeks as two rivers. April slumped to the floor and hugged her legs to her chest as she sobbed uncontrollably.

“Oh come on!” she yelled out as her ringtone interrupted her sob-fest. April pulled the device from her pocket and glanced at the screen – Casey. Sighing, April really wasn’t in the mood to chat - especially with how things ended last time - but her fingers betrayed her by swiping across the screen, answering the call.

“Hello?” Her voice was hoarse though she did her best to stabilize the tremble in her speech.

“Hey!” Casey chirped back. “Listen, I got money from home coming my way and wanted to pass it along to you. I know I’m the last person you want to talk to but I really do wanna…uh, April? You ok?”

April did her best to keep the sniffles quiet though perhaps she was not silent enough. Blinking the tears out of her eyes, she allowed them to continue carving out salty trails down her cheek.

“I…just had a rough night.”

A moment of silence was then followed by “Wanna tell me about it?”

Honestly she did not want to talk about it but the words rolled off her tongue anyway.

“I was on my way home and I was almost ganged up on by two guys but then Raph stopped them and who gave you permission to tell Raph about me being pregnant?!”

“Whoa, whoa! Slow down,” Casey urged, trying to keep up with the rambling. “You weren’t hurt, were you?”

April shook her head before remembering he couldn’t see her. “No. I’m fine…thanks to Raph. I still can’t believe you told him. I wasn’t ready for anyone to know about the baby.”

“I’m sorry, April. You were pushing me away and I needed to be sure that you were gonna be okay.”

Biting her lip, April wasn’t sure if she should have been mad or grateful. Perhaps a little of both.

“Casey, you had no right to have Raph following me around. That was an invasion of my privacy. I’m still trying to figure things out on my own - whether I want to go through with the pregnancy or not…whether I will raise the baby or give it up for adoption. None of this is easy and I didn’t need a shadow stalking me around. Do you understand, Casey?”

“Y-you were…thinking of…an abortion?”

Blue eyes widened, realizing her slip.

“I had a right to consider all of my option, Casey,” she replied sternly to mask her uncertainty.

“Have…have you made a decision?”

April momentarily considered how to relay the sensitive information.

“Well, I was going to terminate the pregnancy. I went to the clinic but…I just couldn’t go through with it. I thought I lot about it and I decided to keep the baby. I know it’s not going to be easy and there’s a lot I need to figure out still, but this just feels right for me.”

A relieved sigh seeped through the receiver. 

“Casey, you do understand I had to consider my own well-being in all of this, don’t you?”

“Yeah,” he replied and then hesitated. “I just didn’t think an abortion was an option you were considering. Not that I would be selfish enough to put my demands on you but I figured when you told me you were pregnant you had already ruled something like that out as an option.”

“Honestly, I just hadn’t figured everything out yet. I wasn’t sure of all of my options or which was the right one for me. And then I wasn’t sure if I would be able to take care of a child on my own. I just didn’t know what else to do. But now I know that this baby is forever a part of me and I just couldn’t go through with it. I can’t really explain it but I had a feeling, like one of those intuitions. That’s when I knew an abortion wasn’t right for me. I still don’t know how I will raise a child while finishing school and then look for work and…well, all of it really.”

“That’s your problem, April. You’re trying to do it on your own when you don’t have to. I promise we are in this together, April. I know I’m not close to home right now but I’m not abandoning you either. I do want to be a part of your and the baby’s life. I’ll find a way to make it work.”

April wanted to believe him. To be hopeful that she would have a support system to lean on. At the same time she was utterly afraid of being let down just to find herself completely alone.

“Have you talked to your dad yet?”

April snapped out of her thoughts not realizing she had started zoning out.

“Not yet,” she admitted softly. “I wasn’t sure how to bring it up to him. I don’t want to burden him.”

Casey chuckled a bit. “Oh come on, April. After alien abductions and mutations becoming a grandfather might be a welcomed change of pace. A little one for him to spoil. That type of support system will be good for you, April. I’m sure he wouldn’t mind watching the baby while you’re studying. His practice is back into full swing and financially stable again. I know you hate to ask for money but he’s your dad, he would definitely help with expenses until we are able to support ourselves properly. My sister is old enough to babysit too. If you want to do summer classes I’m sure she would be happy to babysit. We can make this work. And if you need moral support when you do tell your dad, I’ll be in town for a game in a few weeks and then I’ll be on Spring Break for the following week. We can use that time to share the news with our families…together. We don’t have to do any of this on our own.”

More tears stung her eyes – not from sadness though. These were tears of hope. For the first time, April thought that things might actually be okay.

“Yeah, let’s do that. Though in a few weeks the belly bump will speak for itself,” she joked and sniffled at the same time.

“So no one can tell yet?”

“Not really. Not when I’m wearing loose clothing. Except for the women who recognize morning sickness otherwise I no one knows unless I say something…or you for that matter,” she playfully accused. “By the time you come, I’ll be in the second trimester so things will definitely be more obvious by then.”

“So have you started reading pregnancy books?”

“Yeah. There’s also a website I use. And I have an app to start tracking things like my appointments and get new weekly updates on what’s happening inside my uterus.”

April giggled at her news reporter style voiceover as she reported her newest developments. It felt good to be able to laugh again. Then Raph’s words from the previous night sobered her up again.

“Hey, Casey. Raph said something last night that’s been on my mind and I want to run it by you.”

“Okay…,” Casey was not sure what to expect next.

“After Raph bailed me out last night, he was saying that things can get really complicated if the Foot or if the Kraang was still around and they caught wind of my pregnancy. I could find myself in constant danger. He suggested that I tell the others about me being pregnant. Kind of like a safety net for myself. I mean Raph’s blowing the whole thing out of proportion, right?”

Without missing a beat, Casey responded with “He has a point. And let’s say the Kraang aren’t gone. What if they’re ‘underground’ or something? You already have weird alien powers. What if the baby inherited all of that? The baby might prove to be valuable to them. We really have no idea what to expect at this point. It would be smart to let the rest of the guys know. At least we know the turtles will never let anything happen to you.”

April squeezed her eyes shut and slightly banged the back of her head against the wall. Deep down she knew it would come down to this. It still didn’t make the situation any easier. 

\- Present -

Yet here she was, navigating the sewers. No pregnant woman should be down here but what choice did she have? At least she knew some of the more sanitary routes to walk through. However there were some putrid junctions that were unavoidable. It still amazed her how the sewers somehow became a second home for her. She knew the route to the lair like the back of her hand. Though she did chuckle at the time she was prone to getting hopelessly lost; that felt like such a long time ago. As she turned into the last tunnel, butterflies fluttered mercilessly in her stomach. Her nerves and the stench threatened to push her nausea over the edge. Soon a soft light began to illuminate the tunnel, indicating she was nearing the lair. April’s head began spinning as she second guessed why she came all this way, but her feet refused to listen to her head as they spurred her on to the entrance. She swiftly turned the corner toward the turnstiles but being lost in her thoughts she nearly collided with a tall, solid object. Still being on edge from the night before, April jumped back slightly at the approaching mass and placed a hand on her startled heart. Gazing up, her blue eyes peered into a pair of confused brick-red eyes. Donnie froze in place and uttered no words of greetings. A new wave of panic washed over April as she pondered whether it was too late to turn back now.


	9. Path of Least Resistance

Chapter 8 – Path of Least Resistance

Still as a statue, Donnie stared down at the woman before him - petrified as if spellbound by the redheaded enchantress. The rag that had been wiping his hands now hung limply. His racing heart thumped painfully in his chest. Was it not enough that she haunted his dreams? Now she had the audacity to show up at the lair after avoiding them for over two months! He wanted so desperately to tell her to leave, that she had no business showing her face here, that she stole his dignity only to leave a deep void in his soul. Yet the words eluded him. Lightheadedness made it difficult to form any coherent thought - though changing the oil out the Shellraiser was most likely to be blamed.

“What are you doing here?”

Donnie resisted wincing at his own curtness. The rudeness was unintended but given the bottled up resentment he harbored who could blame him. April was the last person he wanted to see. However, sorrow filled eyes softened his heart; he cursed his weakness. Yet he maintained his cold composure lest she should discover the powerful hold she had on his soul.

April cleared her throat and broke eye contact. 

“Are your brothers here? I need to talk to you guys about something.”

“April!”

The gruff and unusually happy – or was it relieved? - voice called out from behind Donnie. He turned around and eyed Raph, sensing the shorter brother was the reason behind the temptress’ presence.

“Hey, Raph,” she replied, offering a slight wave.

“Come on in. Go ahead and make yourself comfortable. I’ll get Leo. Donnie, why don’t you go grab Mikey?”

April nodded at Raph before walking off to the family room. As soon as she was out of earshot, Donnie tightly grabbed Raph’s thick arm and whispered, “You knew she was coming?”

“Not exactly.” Raph glared at Donnie’s betrayed countenance. “What’s it to you anyway? Even if I invited her over, I don’t need to run it by you. She’s our friend. And right now she really needs us.”

“A friend who hasn’t spoken to us in months and suddenly shows up out of the blue…there’s a catch.”

“Yes, there is.”

There is was – his confirmation. Raph absolutely knew why April was wiggling her way back into their lives. Hell, he probably invited her back. Donnie’s eyebrows furrowed, carving deep creases between his eyes.

“You know why she’s here, don’t you?”

“Get Mikey,” Raph commanded, ripping his arm out of Donnie’s grasp. “And do us all a favor and get over yourself, Don. We ain’t little kids no more. I don’t need to pep talk you whenever your crush plans to drop by. Besides, don’t you think it’s time to let her go? She was never into you anyway. It’s time to finally accept that. It’s the adult thing to do.”

With the final stab to Donnie’s already broken heart, Raph left to track down Leo, leaving Donnie to sulk alone. The dejected turtle finally stormed off in search of Mikey only to (not so surprisingly) find him whipping up a snack in the kitchen. Donnie should have known better than to find him anywhere else though, much to his chagrin, it took searching several rooms while strategically avoiding eye contact with April each time he passed through the family room to track down the youngest ninja. Finally locating him however was both a blessing and a curse – blessed to have found a sanctuary away from April but cursed that he had no choice but to go back out and confront her again. Donnie resigned to leaning against the wall with his eyes shut as he recited a silent mantra in hopes to calm his nerves.

“What’s up with you?” Mikey asked in between bites of cold pizza.

“April,” Donnie mumbled out. Nothing more needed to be said.

Mikey studied the beads of sweat rolling down Donnie’s face along with the expression that strongly resembled like Donnie might hurl. Sky blue eyes shot wide open as he choked down his mouthful of pizza.

“Oh God! You didn’t have sex with her again, did you?!”

This time Donnie’s his eyes shot wide open as he restrained the urge to lash out and choke his brother.

“Shhh!” he spat out. “She’s out there! And I don’t need anyone else knowing about that.”

“She’s…out there?! What is she doing here?!”

“The hell should I know,” Donnie hissed. “I didn’t exactly have a chance to strike up small talk.”

“Ooh, do you think she came to announce her pregnancy? Ooh, and that she needs a sample of your DNA so she can confirm whether you or Casey is the father.”

_Not this again!_

Donnie glared at Mikey as if the turtle was about to touch one of his precious lab equipment. He approached his brother, pinning him against the kitchen counter – their faces mere millimeters apart.

“I swear on Darwin’s grave if you say anything to embarrass me I will end you and make it look like Raph did it.”

Mikey gulped down the rest of his pizza, which was incredibly hard given that his throat suddenly felt dry and prickly like a cactus. Shooting one last warning glare, Donnie turned back to the living room with Mikey hot on his heels.

“Hey, April!” Mikey greeted enthusiastically. Rushing over, Mikey scooped her up in a warm brotherly embrace. “Long time, no see. What brings you back to our humble abode?”

Donnie’s jaw clenched and his muscles grew rigid as he took a seat as far away from April as possible. Instead of chancing a glance at her, he carefully eyed Mikey as if looking for any early signs that he might spill his secrets.

“Well I have an announcement,” she began while nervously wringing her hands together. “Well, Raph already knows…,” the words stumbled out.

Donnie turned his head and peered at Raph, who only nodded encouragement toward the nervous girl.

“Go ahead,” he urged.

“Well…I-I’m pregnant.”

“Whoa!” Leo’s eyes widened in surprise but offered his congratulations to the news.

“Holy cow! No way!”

Wanting to smack his forehead, Donnie glared daggers at Mikey while praying that no one else noticed the over-the-top reaction.

_That boy may not survive the day at this rate._

“When are you due?” Leo inquired, genuinely interested in the subject.

“In September. So I still have quite a ways to go.”

“I suggested to April that it was best that she told us now. Especially since we’re not completely sure whether the Kraang could become an issue in the future again or not.”

“Smart move, Raph...” 

_Did hell suddenly freeze over? Leo actually validated Raph’s idea. Even complimented it!_

“…We can’t be too careful. We’ve learned that the hard way too many times before.” Leo then refocused his attention back to April. “Does Casey know yet?”

“Yeah, he does,” April replied seemingly a bit more at ease though she avoided looking at Donnie’s direction.

While careful not to stare too long at her, Donnie did steal several brief observations. She seemed more pale than usual. Perhaps the morning sickness was rough for her. Dark circles under her eyes suggested lack of sleep. Donnie did not see signs of the “baby bump.” Her breasts however….

April’s sky blue eyes momentarily locked on Donnie’s but just as quickly looked away. Blushing slightly, Donnie desperately hoped April did not notice him staring at her engorged breasts. Ashamed of consistently being drawn to April’s beauty, Donnie shifted his gaze to the ground – a much safer focal point. Donnie only half-listened as the others chatted about April’s uncertainty of completing college, Casey’s involvement since he was so far away, and who knows what else; Donnie began tuning out the conversation. Instead Donnie’s mind became consumed with memories of April’s inconsideration and betrayal.

Did she ever think about what she did to him? That she broke his heart? Forever carved her mark into his soul? Did she regret using and abusing him? Did she even care?

“Donnie?!”

“Huh?” 

Leo’s irritated voice snapped Donnie back to reality. His cheeks burned when he found five pairs of eyes staring at him. _Hold on, when did Sensei enter the room?_

“Dude, focus,” Mikey chided a bit, earning him an icy glare that threatened murder.

“Sorry. Guess I spaced out. What’s going on?”

Leo shut his eyes and inhaled deeply. Donnie had to give Leo credit – being a leader required iron clad patience, especially when managing your own siblings.

“We’re going to rotate escorting April around. As always we’ll keep to the shadows. We only need to ensure April’s safety. April, you can call us whenever may need to go out – run errands or go to appointments.”

“Hold on,” Donnie interjected. “Wouldn’t our constant presence just rouse suspicion? It might draw more attention to her. It’s exactly what drew the Foot’s interest to April the first time around.”

“As the baby grows, her abdomen alone will draw attention. At least if the Kraang or the Foot tries to pull anything, we’ll be able to preemptively handle the situation. It’s better than the alternative if she’s already put into harm’s way. And…,” Leo paused as if to generate a dramatic effect. “…You have duty tonight.”

Resisting the urge to roll his eyes, Donnie managed to maintain his composure and hid his disgust at being thrust into the situation.

“Come on,” he called out as he stood up. “We’ll take the Party Wagon. We can get you home quickly and more discreetly that way.”

It took a few moments but Donnie finally heard April’s soft footsteps following into the garage. Even after getting into the van, Donnie locked his eyes forward refusing to acknowledge her presence as April settled into the passenger seat. Once the door clicked shut, Donnie revved up the engine and began the dreaded drive to the university.

. . .

The silence hung thick in the air, suffocating the turtle with its misery grasp. He even controlled his breathing, remaining as silent as possible, so that he wouldn’t draw attention to himself. Tunneling his vision, he refused to look the girl next to him. He wasn’t even sure if April was facing him at all. 

_I swear they were all conspiring against me. Did Mikey blab his big mouth to everyone else? Were they all rubbing it in that I was screwed over and have to be forever reminded of it…_

A sudden gust of wind filled the van as April slightly leaned her face out of the open window.

“U-uh,” he stammered nervously. “A-are you okay?”

Biting his lip he immediately regretted the idiotic question.

_She’s pregnant and probably still suffering from morning sickness._

“The oil smell is really strong. It’s making me nauseous.”

“Sorry.” He genuinely was. Donnie may have harbored a lot of anger and resentment but he wouldn’t purposely cause April physical discomfort. He chewed his lip as he mulled over his choice of words. “I don’t mean to be difficult but can we roll it up more. We can leave it cracked so you can get fresh air. But I redid the tinting so that giant mutant turtles can be concealed from public viewing.”

April blushed and lowered her eyes to her lap. “Sorry, I didn’t think about that,” she admitted a bit sheepishly while rolling the window back up, leaving only a sliver of separation for the air to seep in.

Donnie snorted back a response, earning him a stony glare. He didn’t need to look at her to feel April’s eyes drilling holes into him.

“What?” she sneered.

“Nothing,” Donnie grumbled back.

April parted her lips as if to press him more, but instead kept silent. Donnie thanked any potential divine being that may have existed and intervened on his behalf. As he drove closer to the university, April’s hands started twisting around one another. Even after stopping in front of the dormitory’s main entrance, April refused to move with the exception of her left leg now bouncing rapidly. April’s agitation got under his skin as he fought hard not to acknowledge it. He found himself praying once again that April would not open any can of worms.

“Donnie?”

_Damn it!_

“Yeah,” he sighed while peaking at her from the corner of his eye.

“I…I…”

_Oh, come on! Just spit it out!_

“I know…I can’t take back what happened….back then. And no amount of apology will ever undo what happened between us. But given that we will have to work together, I hope we can learn to put our differences aside, find common ground, and work together.”

Donnie’s grip tightened around the steering wheel as he stared incredulously at the horn.

That’s it?! You can’t take back what happened so you’re not even going to offer a real apology…at all?!

The air suddenly felt suffocating as if ghostly tendrils wrapped securely around his throat. In the haze the world spun dizzyingly. He struggled to remember the speech he rehearsed so many times just to find his thoughts to be nothing more than a rambling, jumbled mess of pure, unadulterated rage.

“Yeah…sure,” he finally squeaked out for diplomacy’s sake. Donnie craned his neck hoping to crack out his frustrations but only resulted in straining his muscle. How the hell does Raph do it so well?

“Hey, Donnie? Can I ask you something?”

April must have sensed his tension. Her tone was more hesitant…cautious.

_Why is she still here? Why can’t she just leave already?_

Donnie sucked in the thick, hot air, which did absolutely nothing to help to sooth his nerves – at all!

“Sure.”

The reluctance was more than evident but April ignored it.

“I know I already said Casey is the baby’s father, but I just need to be sure. I mean, there was no way we could…you know. A turtle and a human can’t conceive a child. Right? We are different species after all…”

His blood boiled up; the pressure forcing through his veins. Donnie turned and stared deep into April’s eyes. He wasn’t sure what he expected to find in those blue orbs. Her hope? Fear? Uncertainty? One thing was for sure – she didn’t want a freak for a child.

“You have nothing to worry about, April. Crossbreeding is impossible in with species as different as humans and turtles. You and Casey were absolutely made for each other.”

As soon as he spat out the last sentence, hurt blue eyes fell to the ground and Donnie swore he saw tears forming. He wasn’t sure if it was so much what he said or rather how he said it. Either way he felt no regrets. As tears trailed down her cheek, Donnie instantly feared he would once again fall for her bewitchment as he wanted nothing more than to embrace her and beg for forgiveness. He mentally cursed his character flaw. From the first moment they met, April had forever secured her talons into his heart and did not hesitate to twist it however she pleased.

Donnie peeled his gaze away from her and firmly suggested, “You should get out now, April.”

Refusing to acknowledge her presence any further, Donnie waited for the door to swing open and slam shut to confirm that April was finally gone. Not bothering to ensure that she entered the building safely, Donnie sped off, anxious to find sanctuary in his laboratory amongst his mechanical companions – the only things in his life that will never disappoint him.


	10. Potholes

Chapter 9 - Potholes

“Excuse me?!”

The high pitch screeched was more than his throbbing head could handle. Casey rubbed his temple as Hailey screamed out her tirade.

“That is no excuse! I’m your girlfriend. We used to go out for dinners and parties. Now you act like I don’t exist!”

_Is she fucking serious?!_

“Did you not hear a word I said?” Incredulous venom dripped from his voice. “April’s pregnant! With my child! I have responsibilities to worry about. I have to cut back financially to focus on the baby.”

Hailey crossed her arms, tapping her foot in annoyance. She pursed her lips and stared at him through narrowed eyes.

“Don’t,” he warned her as he narrowed his eyes. “Remember, you knew I had another girlfriend when you got involved with me. Surely you knew the risk.”

“Stupid bitch should have used birth control,” she muttered under her breath.

That was the final straw! Teeth gritted painful against each other and his hands clenched tightly; thankfully his nails were always short otherwise he might have drawn blood.

“Look, Hailey, whether April and I used protection or not is really none of your business…”

“Hold up! You didn’t use protection!” Hailey contorted her face into the most offended look possible. “You could have given me a STD!”

“Why does everything have to be about you?!” Casey had enough of trying to keep his cool as he yelled loud enough that the neighboring dorms surely must have heard the commotion. “Look, you knew I had a girlfriend back home. You knew I was playing both fields. That was the risk you chose to take. I didn’t plan on getting April pregnant but she is. I am going to be a father. I will put my child first. If you can’t handle that, then you can leave!”

That was a month ago. Casey hadn’t seen Hailey since. Good riddance. The so-called relationship drained him – emotionally, financially, mentally. The girl was so crazy needy that she completely distracted him from him from hockey practice, his studies. Yes! Partying was finally sidelined in favor of ensuring Casey would keep his scholarship and graduate with a degree in criminal justice. Despite working nonstop Casey was the most focused and sane since the break-up with April. 

Now, his focus had best not waver. He stood at center rink, staring down the big, burly opponent. Their eyes locked on each other intensely as they waited for the puck to hit the ice. Championship game between fierce rivals – Casey’ adrenaline surged more than the days he moonlighted as a vigilante fighting evil ninjas. From the corner of his eye Casey spotted the referee. The few seconds seemed agonizingly long as the world stood still. That was until he heard the puck clink against the ice. Wooden sticks clashed against each other as the battle for the puck ensued. Skates screeched across the ice as the players chased each other, seeking for control over the black object. 

As the minutes ticked away the competition grew fiercer. Players sharply cut each other off. Pretty much every player had been body-checked into the wall at some point. Each goal attempt had been blocked or stolen, and when Casey finally made the first goal, the other team matched it. Finally Casey was in possession of the puck again. He sped down the rink weaving through the other team. About halfway down the rink, his peripheral caught a glimpse of a familiar face. Casey shifted his gaze more and confirmed that April was sitting in the stands, about three rows away. Her red hair framed her pale, freckled face. Casey almost had to do a double take to confirm it that it was indeed April. 

_She never said she was coming._

“Oomph!”

A stick swiped into his skates and Casey crashed face first into the ice. Scrambling to his feet, Casey cursed under his breath as he chased down the player who literally stole the puck from right under him. As the puck thief skated closer to the goal, Casey desperately searched for a way to prevent him from reaching the goal. He couldn’t skate fast enough to steal the puck back. Pushing harder, Casey was barely in reach when he pushed his stick out and hooked it around the guy’s ankle, forcing him hard onto the ice. Just as quickly as the player hit the ice, he rebounded back up and was charging toward Casey.

“Fucking asshole!” he spat out as he threw his gloves off.

Casey held his ground and kept his gloves on. Determination etched into his facial features as he resolved to not cave into intimidation and dares to initiate a fight. Then reality struck him across the face – literally! The force of the punch combined with the slippery ice knocked Casey down. A hand grabbed him by the back of his uniform as a fist knocked his helmet off and began pummeling his face. The whistle blared menacingly as the referee separate the two opponents. Even though he never threw a punch Casey still found himself in the penalty box but at least his “time out” was shorter. As he skating past April he locked eyes on her and grinned when she flashed a proud smile at him. Locked in his box, Casey anxiously waiting to get back onto the ice.

. . . 

“Sabres! Sabres! Sabres!”

The victorious chant rang throughout the locker room. The game was tight but they won; that’s all that mattered. Casey discarded his towel. Determined to beat a world record, he dressed swiftly and hoped that April hadn’t left the arena yet.

“What’s the hurry?” Johnny snuck up from behind causing him to jump at the sound of his voice. “Thought we’re all going out to celebrate together.”

“Yeah, but I was hoping to catch April before we head out.”

A look of questioning and then understanding flashed through Johnny’s eyes.

“Oh, I didn’t realize she came to the game.”

A goofy grin pulled at Casey’s lips as he remembered skating by her. “Honestly, I didn’t know she was gonna show up. It’s the reason I got tripped up on the ice.”

Johnny shook his head as he silently chastised the younger man. “Shame on you for losing focus. Better not let the others know.”

“Better not tell them,” Casey countered as he zipped his pants up and quickly slipped on his jacket. “Catch you guys in a bit!”

Without waiting for a proper good-bye, Casey hoisted his bag over his shoulder and raced out the locker room door. Turning around the corner, Casey’s eyes widened as he skidded to a halt, nearly knocking April over.

“Oh God!” April jumped, placing her hand over her heart.

“S-sorry,” Casey stammered. “I didn’t expect to see you back here. I mean so close to the locker rooms.”

April chuckled as Casey struggled to find the right words to say. 

“It’s fine. I should have texted you.” April fidgeted with her fingers a bit, unsure of how to proceed. “It was a really good game out there. Congrats on the win. Though I must say, I’m impressed you didn’t swing at that one guy.”

Running his fingers through his black locks, Casey flashed a proud smirk. “Yeah, thanks. Guess I must finally be growing up, huh?”

“I guess you are,” she replied with a playful congratulatory pat on his shoulder. 

As he stared into her blue eyes, Casey couldn’t help but let his gaze trace over her body until it settled on her rounded belly. Up to that point, he had only seen her upper torso during the video chats. Not that Casey was not mindful of their current reality it still felt different to visually confirm that a child was indeed growin inside of her.

“How have you been feeling?”

“Better.” April even sounded livelier compared to their chats. “I’m eating better. I sometimes feel nauseous but not nearly as much was last month. Think I’m finally outgrowing that phase. Not feeling as tired either. This must be that honeymoon phase I read about before you go back to feeling tired…and fat.”

“Have you felt the baby move yet?” Casey resisted the urge to place his hand on her stomach to see if he could. He wasn’t even sure if she would even allow him to.

“Not yet…at least I don’t think so. Nothing like kicks or jabs. Apparently if the baby moves it might be confused for gas bubbles so I might have but I really have no idea. I sound pretty stupid, don’t I?”

“Not at all. Look it’s a new experience for you. It’s okay to not be sure, but,” Casey reached down and placed her hand in his, “I’ll be here to learn with you. Everything will be okay, I promise.”

April’s eyes grew misty as she offered a soft smile. Doubt still visible in her blue orbs.

“What is it, April?”

“I- I just don’t know. I want to believe everything will be fine. I just…it’s just hard right now. Trying to focus on school and all. It’s been hard to concentrate. It’s so much easier for you. You don’t have to deal with the physical aspects of the pregnancy getting in the way. You can still carry out your life normally. It’s not like it interferes with your school work, practice, your girlfriend…”

“Ex-girlfriend,” he interrupted.

April stared intently into his eyes as if looking for any evidence to the contrary.

“She was being a bitch about the whole pregnancy thing. Couldn’t handle that I would put the baby first so she’s gone now.”

“I…I’m sorry….”

That was a lie. The hitch in her tone betrayed her words.

“It’s fine, really. I didn’t need that in my life.” Casey released a heavy sigh, a bit tired of having to repeat the sentiment. “I meant it when I said I was completely here for you. That you and the baby would have top priority in my life. I really need you to start believing that.”

With shame in her eyes, April lowered her gaze to the ground and offered a slight nod. “I’m sorry,” she whispered.

Casey pulled her into a hug while gently patting her back. In return, she wrapped her own arms around him and relaxed her muscles.

_One way or another April I promise you that I will earn back your trust._


End file.
